Pag-iisang Dibdib

.... May is not just election season or the fiesta season.  It is also the wedding season.

Per the National Statistics Office (NSO), May — not June — is the Filipino’s most sought-after month for wedding. In 2010, of the total 482,480 weddings, 11.2% or 54,037 were celebrated in May.  In 2011, of the 476,408 registered marriages, 11.7 percent or about 55,529, occurred in May. June is not even second place. For 2010, December and January came in second, both at 10.6 percent.

If the trend continues, there must be, for this month alone, in the Philippines, at least 55,000 couples saying “I do.” This translates to 55,000 families being founded this month, More dramatically, 1,774 new families emerge in the Philippines, every day in May, via the formal wedding route.

Aside from elections, therefore, (or perhaps precisely because of the upcoming elections),  it is high time to talk about marriage and family life. As Aristotle said: “Man is by nature more inclined to live as a couple than to associate politically, since the family is something that precedes and is more necessary than the state.”

Marriage is best described by the Filipino word for it — “pag-iisang dibdib.”

“Pag-iisa” (the process of uniting) captures the reality that man and woman were created for one another. “Therefore a man leaves his father and his mother and cleaves to his wife, and they become one flesh.” (Gen 2:24)

Opinion ( Article MRec ), pagematch: 1, sectionmatch: 1

The word “dibdib” (referring to the heart), in turn, signifies the unbreakable union of two lives, into a covenant of love, recalling what the plan of the Creator had been in the beginning: “So they are no longer two, but one flesh.”  (Mt 19:6; CCC 1605)

“Pag-iisang dibdib” vividly expresses the indissoluble union of man and woman, such that “what therefore God has joined together, let no man put asunder.” (Mt 19:6.) It also is a reminder that “marriage is a process, not a state, a beginning, not an end; a threshold, not a goal. Your marriage certificate is a learner’s permit, not a diploma.” (Catechism for Filipino Catholics  1901)

In a report released last month, NSO stated that since 2009, the number of marriages has been declining. There was a 1.3 per cent drop from 2010 to 2011:  from 482,480 to 476,408 marriages.

There is nothing in these figures however that detract from the fact that marriage is still overwhelmingly popular and remains to be the Filipino’s ideal. Filipinos still choose marriage over cohabitation or common law relationship; and they aspire to stay married instead of separating, whether legally or de facto.   

In NSO figures for 2000, 45.8% of the total population 10 years old and above, were legally married, 1.2% were separated, 4.2% were in common law relationship, 6.2% widowed and 1.1% unknown. The singles accounted for 41.4%. In 2007, the legally married accounted for 45.33%, the divorced/separated 1.16%, common law/live-in/unknown  4.86%,  and the widowed 4.33%. The singles accounted for 44.3%,

Indeed, just like in other countries, “regardless of social background, marriage and family life remains a widely shared aspiration. This desire has increased over the past two decades from 77 per cent who said they would choose marriage in 1975 to 80 per cent in 1995.” (Kevin Andrews, “Maybe I do-modern marriage & the pursuit of happiness”, 2012 ed., p. 21)

There is no doubt that the attacks against marriage are still raging.  Experts refer to one of the most potent of these attacks as the “deconstruction” of marriage and family life, where marriage and family are viewed to be something that we ourselves created and therefore man may arbitrarily go for new forms of love and creation.

This is the reason why, with the lack of pro-marriage and family initiatives and legislations, couples are helping other couples, and families are supporting one another, to preserve, promote, and witness to the dignity of “pag-iisang dibdib.”

Since February this year, every week, in the various Philippine provinces and across the globe, thousands of couples have been renewing their marriage vows, after attending what has been dubbed as “Cana Weekend.”

I have personally witnessed the ones conducted in Baguio City, Tagaytay City, La Union, Ilocos Norte, and in Palawan.  Mindanao couples held their Cana Weekend in Surigao City, those in Leyte in Ormoc City, those in Bicol in Legaspi, Albay.  Singapore had its Cana Weekend last April 13, 2013 while UAE and Kuwait held theirs on February 22 and 25, 2013, respectively.

The Cana Weekend in North America will be held on July 12-14, 2013 in Vancouver, Canada, and on July 26-28, 2013 in New Jersey.

In all these Cana Weekends, married couples are reminded that marriage is actually “a moment in salvation history” and family life should be a “foretaste of heaven.” These notions are captured by another Filipino expression for marriage: “lumagay sa tahimik” (literally to be in a place of calm and peace) and the word “tahan” (be at peace, comforted or consoled). 

Indeed, the concept and reality of “pag-iisang dibdib”, “paglagay sa tahimik,” and “tahanan” should be defended against threats from forces that seek to make them extinct in the Filipino vocabulary and more importantly,  in the Filipino psyche. 

(As submitted to Ugnayan Column in  Philippine Star; http://www.philstar.com/opinion/2013/04/28/935790/pag-iisang-dibdib)

MAPAGMALASAKIT (COMPASSIONATE)

Pope Francis, in one of his speeches, said that the “father of lies is able to usurp noble words.”[1]  So do men. Moved by personal and selfish agenda,  we—yes, we --- sometimes appropriate noble words to somehow suit our own interests.   Words like honor, truth, justice and freedom; brotherhood, community and country.

In the Philippines, one of the most usurped word of late is “malasakit”, the Filipino word for “compassion”.  It must be because it is election season, when candidates could not afford to be branded as indifferent, cruel, even inhuman.  Malasakit is the most sought after value.  It is the brand to beat.

But what really is malasakit?  What is genuine compassion? This was where I was led to reflecting this Holy Week.

I found one of the most beautiful descriptions and discussions of “compassion” in the book given to me by Marivi Dalman, a sister in CFC  titled:  “Compassion” written by Henri J. M. Nouwen, Donald P. McNeill and Douglas A. Morrison (1983).  It is a 1983 book. But it is fresh and new as it seeks inspiration from the Letter of Paul to the Philippians, the same epistle where CFC lifts its theme this year. And it speaks about compassion, the same theme that is celebrated by the whole Christendom in this year of mercy.

Allow me to share some excerpts:

“The word compassion is derived from  the Latin words pati  and cum,  which together mean ‘to suffer with’.

Compassion asks us to go where it hurts, to enter into places of pain, to share in brokenness, fear, confusion and anguish. Compassion challenges us to cry out with those in misery, to mourn with those who are lonely, to weep with those in tears.

Compassion requires us to be weak with the weak, vulnerable with the vulnerable, and powerless with the powerless.

Compassion means full immersion in the condition of being human. When we look at compassion this way, it becomes clear that something more is involved than a general kindness or tenderness…..”

In practical terms, the authors describe compassion this way---   

“When do we receive real comfort and consolation?  Is it when someone teaches us how to think or act?  Is it when we receive advice about where to go or what to do?  Is it when we hear words of reassurance and hope? Sometimes, perhaps.

But what really count is that in moments of pain and suffering someone stays with us. More important than any particular action or word of advice is the simple presence of someone who cares.

When someone says to us in the midst of a crisis, “I do not know what to say or what to do, but I want you to realize that I am with you, that I will not leave you alone,” we have a friend through whom we can find consolation and comfort.  

In a time so filled with methods and techniques designed to change people, to influence their behavior and to make them do new things and think new thoughts, we had lost the simple but difficult gift of being present to each other.  

We have lost this gift because we have been led to believe that presence must be useful. We say, “Why should I visit this person? I can’t do anything anyway. I don’t even have anything to say. Of what use can I be?’ Meanwhile, we have forgotten that it is often in ‘useless’, unpretentious, humble presence to each other that we feel consolation and comfort.

Simply being with someone is difficult because it asks of us that we share in the other’s vulnerability, enter with him or her into the experience of weakness and powerlessness, become part of uncertainty, and give up control and self-determination. And still, whenever this happens, new strength and new hope is born.

Those who offer us comfort and consolation by being and staying with us in moments of illness, mental anguish, or spiritual darkness often grow as close to us as those with us by willingly entering the dark, uncharted spaces of our lives. For this reason, they are the ones who bring new hope and help us discover new directions.

These reflections offer only a glimpse of what we mean when we say that God is a God-with-us, a God who came to share our lives in solidarity. It does not mean that God solves our problems, shows us the way out of the confusion, or offers answers for our many questions. God might do all of that, but the solidarity of God consists in the fact that God is willing to enter with us into our problems, confusions and questions.

That is the good news of God’s taking on human flesh.”

While reading these, one cannot but recall Pope Francis’ impromptu homily in Tacloban last year, when Pope Francis reawakened in us as a nation what true compassion and Who Compassion is. Addressing the thousands people sobbing and grieving in the rains, the Pope said:

“I’d like to tell you something close to my heart. When I saw from Rome that catastrophe, I had to be here. And on those very days I decided to come here. I am here to be with you – a little bit late, but I’m here.

I have come to tell you that Jesus is Lord. And he never lets us down….So many of you have lost everything. I don’t know what to say to you. But the Lord does know what to say to you. Some of you have lost part of your families. All I can do is keep silence and walk with you all with my silent heart. Many of you have asked the Lord – why lord? And to each of you, to your heart, Christ responds with his heart from the cross. I have no more words for you. Let us look to Christ. He is the Lord. He understands us because he underwent all the trials that we, that you, have experienced…”

From the relative comforts of Rome to the travails of Tacloban, just to say “I don’t know what to say ” to a desolate people crying for inspiration and searching for direction – that was compassion personified. The genuine malasakit or more accurately, “pagpapakasakit.”

It is in this context that I remember Monsignor Allen Aganon in last year’s Mission Core Advent Recollection, speaking to the leaders of Couples for Christ about mercy and compassion, and exhorting them to be “missionaries of perfection”.  He said that mercy and compassion is very difficult; it journeys actually, to perfection.

Indeed. The grace of being compassionate is something received. It is not appropriated for oneself, as to do so is like usurping a noble word.

We can humbly start the “journey to compassion” through simple and little ways. Like comforting our own child and spouse, as we all have done, while spending time with them and staying and journeying with them, during this Lenten break.  

Or by exerting to do what we have all been long asked to since July, 2014, when we first heard of the Philippines being a “a nation of mercy and compassion” through the CBCP Pastoral Exhortation, gently reminding and tenderly telling us:

“We encourage you our dear people to resolve to make an act of mercy every day.

You can reach out to a lonely stranger. You can tell the story of Jesus to a child eager to understand and feel the love of God. You can advise a confused co-worker. You can forgive someone who has wronged you.

You can give food to a hungry beggar. You can contribute to building homes for the typhoon victims. You can visit those in jail or prison. You can visit the charity ward of hospitals, drug rehabilitation centers, homes for the elderly and orphanages. You can condole with the grieving families whose loved ones just died. You can give alms to the poor.

You can show mercy by making it a habit to say “please”, “thank you” or a kind word of appreciation. Refraining from cursing and using hurting words is an act of mercy. Being polite to the children and infants, to the sick and the elderly are great acts of mercy.

… we are asked to have more access to the Sacrament of Reconciliation and encourage our priests to increase their availability and visibility at the confessional, and turn earnestly to fervent participation in the Eucharistic sacrifice and even spend more time in Eucharistic adoration and to zealously be involved in making our Basic Ecclesial Communities and other faith-communities as venues for mercy and reconciliation. Let us prepare to see the Pope by reviving personal and family prayer. Pope Francis has challenged us to restore family prayer and devotion in our homes.

All of this opens to, nourishes, and sustains in our lives the gift of Mercy from the Heart of Jesus!...”

With all these, we live out Philippians 4:-4-7, our very theme as Couples for Christ this year.

“Rejoice in the Lord always. I shall say it again: rejoice! Your kindness should be known to all. The Lord is near.  Have no anxiety at all, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God.  Then the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.”

We have been commanded not only to rejoice, pray and give thanks, but also to “Let your kindness be known to all.” (Phil 4:5) 

This is our mandate. And so we seek the grace to struggle and journey to be persons of compassion and missionaries of perfection, the appropriate descriptive word for whom is “mapagmalasakit”  or "mapagpakasakit" (merciful and compassionate).

May God bless us all.

March 27, 2016

7:34 AM

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[1] Pope Francis, Address to 'Popular Movements' Bolivia, July 09, 2015 (ZENIT.org) 

Tahan na.

It was from poet-songwriter Gary Granada that I first heard that the Filipino word tahan should be translated as peace.  For tahan does not mean to stop, or halt or end.  Tahan is more approximated by the phrase, be comforted, be consoled, or be at peace. 

No wonder tahan na is most often uttered by a parent to a crying child.  It is not a plea for the weeping or the wailing to stop, but an assurance that someone who cares is present and will respond. “Are you hungry? I will feed you.  Are you naked and cold? I will clothe you. Are you afraid, or lonely or alone?  I will accompany you.  I am here now my child.”  Tahan na, anak, tahan.

It is from tahan that the Filipino word for home – tahanan -- is rooted.   Tahanan, etymologically speaking, originally means a place of peace.   It is not an ordinary habitation, or just about any other dwelling or place of abode. There is always more to it.  More than the place is the peace. 

Even our language constantly reminds us of our innermost and innate desire: for our “home” to be that place of comfort, consolation, serenity and peace.  We dream and believe that to be “home”, is actually to journey to happiness, and to experience, what the Church fathers call as, a “foretaste of heaven”.

It is not thus surprising that tahanan is right there --- at home, where one’s family is. 

It starts with marriage-- the Filipino phrase for which is, “lumagay sa tahimik”.  Literally, the bride and groom anticipate, with much eagerness, joy and excitement, a peaceful life ahead of them. But the celebration of the sacrament of marriage is a momentous and foundational event, described most beautifully in this wise:

“How can I ever express the happiness of a marriage joined by the Church, strengthened by an offering, sealed by a blessing, announced by angels, and ratified by the Father? . . . How wonderful the bond between two believers, now one in hope, one in desire, one in discipline, one in the same service!....” (Familiaris Consortio 30).

With the marriage comes the family, especially when the marital union is blessed with children (“mag-anak”).

In a pilot and pioneering 2007 study, “Measuring Progress of Philippine Society: Gross National Product or Gross National Happiness?” by Romulo A. Virola and  Jessamyn O. Encarnacion, one of the most salient findings is that family life is the most important source of happiness for many Pinoys.

In Cartoon Network’s “New Generations 2012” survey, for Filipino kids, quality time spent with parents is one of the top two things that they are most happy about (tied at 87% with  “appearance”; followed by friends (85%), health (85%), hobbies and interests (79%), and having people they can trust and talk to (77%).

Tahanan, indeed, is still home. Home is tahanan; and this is not a translation, but a tautology.

Interestingly, our laws acknowledge the crucial and foundational nature of marriage and family to the life of this nation. The Philippine Constitution recognizes marriage as “the foundation of the family and shall be protected by the State.” (Art. XV, Sec. 2) The same Constitution “recognizes the Filipino family as the foundation of the nation. Accordingly, it shall strengthen its solidarity and actively promote its total development. (Art. XV, Sec. 1)

In so stating, the Constitution most succinctly describes from whom, through whom and for whom the State exists – the family. The State knows, as individuals and families have long known, that all we want is, ourtahanan.  

(As submitted to Philippine Star for the Ugnayan Column. 

See http://www.philstar.com/opinion/2012-09-16/849511/tahan-na)

Pamahalaan at Tahanan

If  tahanan (home) is from the root word tahan (peace),  pamahalaan-- the Filipino word for government-- is from “bahala”.

Bahala means accountability or responsibility.   When one says “ako na ang bahala,” he means “I shall take care of this.”   And if one says, “kayo na po ang bahala,” this means entrusting to someone, letting the other decide, almost surrendering one’s self or one’s fate to someone else’s guidance, care, stewardship, administration, even control. 

Interestingly, the older version of the term bahala is actually, bathala or batala, the old pre-Hispanic Filipino word for “God”.  This is the source of the popular phrase “bahala na”, translated as, “it is now all up to God.”

There is God in our utterance of bahala na.  And this explains our readiness to surrender control. Not because of utter fatalism, but out of courage and confidence; the assurance that whatever happens , there will always be divine providence. “Bahala na.”

There must there therefore be God in pamahalaan. At the root of pamahalaan (government), at least etymologically speaking, is God.  

Startling!

In recent times we are being made to believe that God has nothing to do with government. The more secular the government is, the better.   The more absent God is in the policymaking process, the more reasonable and prudent and just the whole polity will be.   More acceptable are decisions that are “secular”, “pluralistic”, “post-modern” and “relative”.  To be shut off are the clerics, the Bible, and the Almighty.

Fortunately, the real essence of pamahalaan is not only preserved in its etymology. The Filipino ideal of government acknowledging, even relying on the power of God –pamahalaan -- has been enshrined in the highest law of the land.   

We have a Constitution that expresses the Filipino’s belief and trust in “the Almighty God” who shall bless us with a regime of truth, justice, freedom, love, equality, and peace. The Preamble of our Constitution thus states: “We, the sovereign Filipino people, imploring the aid of Almighty God, in order to build a just and humane society and establish a Government that shall embody our ideals and aspirations, promote the common good, conserve and develop our patrimony, and secure to ourselves and our posterity the blessings of independence and democracy under the rule of law and a regime of truth, justice, freedom, love, equality, and peace, do ordain and promulgate this Constitution.”

Some critics pejoratively say: “only in the Philippines!”  Others even hazard to say that it is because of this non-secular type of constitution and government that the Philippines has remained poor.  I can only humbly argue -- wrong on both points.

It is “not only in the Philippines,” because there is Ireland.

Most of us know Ireland today as among the wealthiest countries in the world in terms of GDP per capita.   In 2011, Ireland was ranked the 7th most developed country in the world by the United Nations' Human Development Index.

Look at the Constitution of Ireland. Its preamble states: “In the Name of the Most Holy Trinity, from Whom is all authority and to Whom, as our final end, all actions both of men and States must be referred, We, the people of Éire, humbly acknowledging all our obligations to our Divine Lord, Jesus Christ, Who sustained our fathers through centuries of trial, gratefully remembering their heroic and unremitting struggle to regain the rightful independence of our Nation, and seeking to promote the common good, with due observance of Prudence, Justice and Charity, so that the dignity and freedom of the individual may be assured, true social order attained, the unity of our country restored, and concord established with other nations, do hereby adopt, enact, and give to ourselves this Constitution.”

This looks like pamahalaan. Bathala is the “Most Holy Trinity”, and the Divine Lord is “Jesus Christ”!

                                                                       * * * * *

Not only is pamahalaan “constitutionalized” in the Philippines.  So too tahanan – through the family life and marriage provisions in our Charter.

Marriage is the foundation of the family, and the family is the foundation of our nation. (Philippine Constitution, Art. XV, sections 2 and 1, respectively)   These are not Church or biblical doctrines; they are constitutional precepts.

The State recognizes the sanctity of family life and shall protect and strengthen the family as a basic autonomous social institution. It shall equally protect the life of the mother, and the life of the unborn from conception. (Art. II, Sec. 12)  This is not a homily from the pulpit, but a basic legal and constitutional mandate.

The State shall defend (a) the right of spouses to found a family; (b) the right of children to assistance and special protection; (c) the right of the family to a family living wage and income; and (4) the right of families or families associations to participate in the planning and implementation of policies and programs that affect them. These are not Church or moral impositions; they are constitutional and legal duties  (Art. XV, Sec. 3).

Legal experts view our Constitution as characterized by “verbosity” with some portions sounding like “political speech rather than a formal document stating only basic precepts.”  It is “full of platitudes” and “[w]hat is worse is the inclusion of certain topics that certainly, by any criterion, have no place in a Constitution.” (Cruz, Philippine Political Law, 1998 ed., pp. 11-12) 

One Supreme Court Justice even went on record in his concurring and dissenting opinion in Biarogo vs. Philippine Truth Commision, G.R. No. 192935,   December 7, 2010,  that:   “Peculiar to our nation is a verbose Constitution.   Herein enshrined are motherhood statements— exhortations for public officers to follow.”

If the above provisions are a result of sheer penchant at verbosity and motherhood statements, what great blessings they are.  They constitutionalized pamahalaan and tahanan, with tremendous repercussions on our legal landscape.

For example, as a result of the provisions on “marriage” and “family” in the 1987 Constitution, the Family Code was enacted defining marriage as “a special contract of permanent union between a man and a woman entered into in accordance with law for the establishment of conjugal and family life.”  

This foreclosed same-sex marriage.  This also delineated “unions based on marriage” and “unions without the benefit of marriage”.

We now do not look with envy the experience of other countries. In the US, with a Constitution which says nothing about marriage and family life, some of its states have defined what marriage is, and they ventured into including same-sex marriages. "In light of these astonishing developments,” says Professor Richard Wilkins, “it is absolutely clear why so many people are putting the words 'marriage' and 'constitution' in the same sentence.  An amendment is necessary to preserve not only the social viability of marriage, but the political integrity of the Constitution." (Richard Wilkins, Marriage and the Constitution: Why We Need an Amendment) 

                                                                       * * * * *

The same constitutional provisions also resulted in introducing in our jurisprudence settled doctrines of far-reaching significance, as follows:

Vitug, J. in Santos vs. CA, G.R. No. 112019,  January 4, 1995, said that the above constitutional provisions “express so well and so distinctly the basic nucleus of our laws on marriage and the family, and they are no doubt the tenets we still hold on to.”

Mendoza, J.  in Balogbog v. CA, G.R. No. 83598,  March 7, 1997, most aptly stated that “The State is interested in the preservation of the family and the sanctity of the family is a matter of constitutional concern.”

Romero, J. in Santos vs. NLRC, G.R. No. 115795,  March 6, 1998, even went on to rule that “having an extra-marital affair is an affront to the sanctity of marriage, which is a basic institution of society. Even our Family Code provides that husband and wife must live together, observe mutual love, respect and fidelity. This is rooted in the fact that both our Constitution and our laws cherish the validity of marriage and unity of the family. Our laws, in implementing this constitutional edict on marriage and the family underscore their permanence, inviolability and solidarity.”

                                                                       * * * * *

Wikipedia has an interesting, but good definition of pamahalaan. Citing English, Leo James. Tagalog-English Dictionary (Talahulugang Tagalog-Ingles)(1990), it defines the word pamahalaan either as "Mamamanginoon sa ibabaw", or "Maging panginoon sa ibabaw", or "Maging bikaryo ng Diyos."

In our history, there have been governments and administrations which appropriated for themselves the powers of God and acted as if they were God, bringing this nation to ruins. Namanginoon sa ibabaw. 

Some wish to be in government to arrogate upon themselves the final authority to judge what truth, goodness, justice and beauty is. Maging panginoon sa ibabaw.

We now look for the many others who view government, as being and becoming the instrument, the deputy of God, to build a just and humane society. Maging bikaryo ng Diyos.

Good governance and good government is service to God. Indeed, pamahalaan. 

(Unedited version of the article submitted to Ugnayan for Philippine Star

http://www.philstar.com/opinion/2012-10-14/859381/pamahalaan-tahanan)

I AM LAY

I am lay. 

I am one among the many.  I am an expert at nothing.  I will not understand with ease the technical, the jargons and paradigms.   It will take time for ideology or ontology or eschatology to sink in my thoughts.  It will entail questions after questions for me to comprehend doctrine and dogma.  Even the simplest code and creed might remain to me, a mystery.  For all I know is work, play and pray, and that yes, that I will die someday.  

I am lay in these troubled times. Post-modern time, they say, is our present time.  The penchant is not to believe in anything and anyone anymore.  Disappointed by the big promises and outrageous claims of even the greatest personages in history, these days are the days of “Ï could not care less” , and of the infamous reply:  “Ma at Pa”, meaning, “Malay ko at  Pakialam ko!”  literally translated as “I do not know anything about it, and I do not want to have anything to do with it.”

But what if, the lay is, in the words of Fr. Robert Barron, “knocked down by grace”? The lay will wrestle with something as big as “faith” and “hope” and “love”.   He will have to be attracted to “communion”, “community” and “mission”.  He will be drawn closer to a Person. He will have to experience an Event that will change the course of his life forever.  He will have a life with direction, after realizing the vastness of the exciting adventure in his horizon. 

The lay will hunger for meaning.  He will search.  He will be restless and will start a quest.  He will find wisdom to words like “we are always in danger of forgetting how blessed we are” or “except for sin, everything is grace” or “the longest journey is from the mind to the heart” or simply, “Peace be with you!”

He will nod in agreement to statements like: “The nearer Christ comes to heart, the more it becomes conscious of its guilt. It will then either ask for his Mercy and find peace or it will turn against Him because he is not ready to give up its sinfulness.” (Fulton Sheen)

The lay will start to recall that all his life, he has actually been in a faith journey. But he will not find any comfort and consolation, until he begins to learn to give his full attention. He will have to gaze at the world as it really is. He will have to open his eyes and remember his “capacity to be astonished”.  In other words, he will have to behold.

The lay will also have to guard his heart. He will ask “Create in me a clean heart”  for by grace, he will have to realize that in order to “behold,”  he will have to start with the heart: “My child, give me your heart, and let your eyes observe my ways.” (Prov 23:26)  He will have to ponder, that is, “to strive to put together (symballousa) in a deeper vision, all the events of which [one] is a privileged witness.” (Pope John Paul II)   

Soon after, delight! As delightful as “ïf I give you a rose, you will not doubt God anymore, but of course, the rose has to unlock a mystical insight and appreciation.” (Tertullian)   

Especially so when the journeying is with the rest of the lay, and the rest of the Church, and with no one excluded and left behind. The lay will always be breathless while participating in this vision:

“The eyes of faith behold a wonderful scene: that of a countless number of lay people, both women and men, busy at work in their daily life and activity, oftentimes far from view and quite unacclaimed by the world, unknown to the world's great personages but nonetheless looked upon in love by the Father, untiring labourers who work in the Lord's vineyard.  Confident and steadfast through the power of God's grace, these are the humble yet great builders of the Kingdom of God in history.” (John Paul II, Christifidelis Laici)

I am lay. In all humility, I am very proud to be so.